In bed at 10:45 on a Saturday because I’m waking up at 3:50 am to go to a horse show.


2 weeks ago on October 4th | J | 1 note

This is NOT supposed to be a whining post…I just have a lot of feelings.

I really don’t want to see another person complaining when they own their own horse, they jump 3’6 and over with said horse, they show every week, and they ride with top trainers or on the A/AA circuit. 

Let me put why I feel this way in perspective:

  • I do not own my own horse. I do not lease a horse. My family barely has the money to let me take lessons. I can’t even ride with my school team right now because I don’t have the money for lessons or shows. 
  • I have only jumped up to 3’3-on a camp pony. I have jumped 3 ft on a horse I leased…last summer. I jumped 2’6 for two years-those years being the last two years of my junior career. My old trainer said I should have been doing the Big Eq…but they didn’t have a horse for me and my mom couldn’t afford one. It has taken me ten years to get to this point when it has taken some other people two or three. 
  • Last summer, I showed once. At a home show. I didn’t even get to go to an away show. When I showed with my old barn, I showed every other weekend, maybe. I did one week of HITS in my entire ten years of riding. How is it that some girls show every day, go to every week of HITS Ocala and HITS Saugerties and HITS Culpeper and WEF and all the big shows I don’t even get to show once a month? 
  • I love my trainer. I really do. And I would not give her up for anything. But sometimes I wish that I could have trainer with Frank Madden or Andre Dignelli or Kip Rosenthal. Sometimes I wish I could have trained at Old Salem or Heritage Farm or Beacon Hill or Benchmark or Arcadia. I wish I could go to the PNHS, WIHS, WEF, and Zones. I wish I could ride on the AA circuit.

Every day I wish I could have been born into a wealthy family that had the means to buy a fancy horse that I could show so that I could have been a top junior rider, and now a top amateur rider.

Honestly, at this point I am beyond willing to muck stalls and clean bridles and sweep floors and be a groom at a show barn so that maybe I can get a chance to show the riding world what I’ve got. Because I know I have talent as a rider, I just need the chance to show it

2 years ago on February 5th | J | 2 notes